Many people read through my articles or see what I post on Facebook or Twitter and tell me that they wish their relationship could be “like that.” They tell me the expectations I set for individuals and couples are unrealistic. That nobody is really that happy. That romance and chivalry are just…dead.
To all of you, absorb this: You have the power to do better.
Like anything in life, great things don’t come to those who wish, great things come to those who actually take action and make changes in order to attract the love, success, and happiness they desire.
Are you not happy with the person you’re with? Walk away.
Do they mistreat you or act in ways that are unacceptable? Communicate your concerns to them, and if they don’t change, walk away.
Are they physically or emotionally abusive in any way? Run away. Now.
I understand that it’s not always that easy. Life gets in the way, there are circumstances that don’t always make standing up and walking out the door a realistic option. But, any time is the perfect time to begin making positive changes in your life and your relationship. Literally, right now.
The one and only way to do this is to apply three simple words that will change your life:
Raise. Your. Standards.
Once you raise your standards and absolutely cut out any possibility of accepting less, you’ll find you very often get your standards met. If someone isn’t meeting your standards, you cut them out of your life. If you’re not meeting your own standards, then you take action in order to improve. Either way – there are no two ways about it – your standards do not get lowered.
The lives we live are direct reflections of the standards we hold for ourselves. The physical body you live in is a reflection of your health standards. If your standard is to wake up five days a week and workout, it will show in your appearance. The people you surround yourself with are a direct reflection of your social standards. If your standard is to only allow people into your life who carry themselves with integrity and show respect to those around them, you will find you have far less drama to complain about than others with much lower standards.
And equally as important: The relationship you have with your significant other is a direct reflection of the standards of love you have chosen to accept. From Stephen Chbosky’s ‘Perks Of Being A Wallflower’ – We accept the love we think we deserve.
The standards you set for the person you choose to commit yourself to will have a direct bearing on your overall happiness. While happiness does have to come from within first, even the happiest of people can be anchored down by an intimate partner’s constant negativity.
Do not waste your years wishing that a person will change – raise your standards and if they truly care, they will rise up to meet them. If not, then you have dodged a bullet sooner rather than later.
Do not waste your years self-loathing while accepting less than you deserve – raise your standards and when that is the only thing you accept in life, that is what you will get. If you deserve better, go do better.
Do not waste one more moment of your time who takes away from your joy – you can’t get any of that time back. Life is too short to be anything but happy.
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