The more women I talk to, the more I realize that the gentleman is a rare breed. The mission of the New Chivalry Movement is to bring men (and women) together who strive to be the best versions of themselves and love and respect those around them.
As the gentleman has become less prominent, so have the respectful acts that define him.
Here are 8 acts of chivalry we often overlook and should work to bring back.
Giving up your seat.
Whether on a bus or on a crowded subway, giving up your seat to another is a rare but great sign of respect. I always cringe a bit when I see a woman, elderly person, or anyone else worthy of respect – forced to stand while young men remain distracted by their phones. It all comes down to being aware of your surroundings and acting accordingly.
Only one in seven men will offer their seat to a woman on a train or bus.
Pulling out a woman’s chair.
This one, as many others, is simple but rare. You don’t have to run around to your date’s side of the table to make sure you pull out her chair each time, but when convenient, it’s a nice extra touch.
Less than one in five men will regularly pull out a chair for a woman to sit down. That’s under 20%.
Open doors for her.
I have countless articles with this point already in them, but it’s one of the staples of chivalrous respect and probably the easiest to perform, as we all walk through doors every day. I don’t want to make any assumptions, but something tells me the extra few seconds it takes to open a door or let someone walk through first won’t ruin your day.
The same goes for car doors, a woman will appreciate you getting out of the car to open the door for her, or walking around to her side first, when you’re picking her up. It’s amazing to me how many men don’t do this.
Call, don’t text a date invite.
Just the fact that you would take the time to actually call a woman to ask her out on a date will put you lightyears ahead of your competition (of which there is a lot). Plus, you’ll be able to tell how excited or enthusiastic she is (or isn’t) about accepting your offer by actually hearing her voice.
Compliments, compliments, compliments.
I don’t know how many times I’ve heard that it’s a rare occasion for a woman to be complimented in her relationship?
Every guy in a relationship should take the time every day to let his woman know how beautiful he thinks she is.
Walking on the street side of the sidewalk.
The purpose of this lost art is to show your willingness to be splashed instead of a woman should a passing car run through a puddle. Furthermore, in some countries people would throw trash out of windows, and the person walking closer to the building, was less likely to be hit.
It’s an effortless way to show her that you care.
Walking her to her door.
At the end of your date, especially early on in the relationship, walk her safely to her door. This is especially important if she lives in a city. It shows you’re willing to put effort into protecting her and makes her feel safe – two important aspects of building her trust and comfort.
Parking far away? Drop her off first.
If you’re having a hard time finding a parking space close to her destination, offer to drop her off at the door while you go and look for a spot. She may be fine with walking the distance, but it’s a nice gesture to save her the effort, especially if she’s wearing heels.
As gentlemen in modern times, you automatically stand out from the crowd. These points above are easy and free, but one would be surprised how rarely they actually occur. For those of us who naturally make it part of our daily lives, it’s difficult to picture how someone else couldn’t. But – it happens.
The new era of chivalry is not rooted in the chauvinistic mindset of the past. We have evolved past performing these acts for women because “they can’t do it themselves.”
The new gentleman performs these acts for the right reasons – love, caring, and respect.