If You Want More, Stop Accepting Less
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[social_warfare]
I understand it’s difficult to find nice, genuine people these days. People who we find to be kind and caring, but still have an attraction to. The type of teammate in life we have developed an image for after being with people who taught us what we don’t want.
The more conversations I have with people, the more I really do see what is lacking in this generation. Simple etiquette, manners, appreciation, affection…simple, basic things that make someone a good partner in a relationship. We can chalk the shortcomings up to many sources. The devaluation of love in our society, perhaps a less-than-ideal upbringing, and/or who knows what else.
But there is also one thing for certain – the good ones are still out there. Many of you reading this are proof of that, because you are one of them. And if you are single, you are probably wondering why you haven’t been properly appreciated by the people you have been with in the past, especially since you have so much to offer.
The issue with people who lack these characteristics themselves is that they tend not to recognize and fully appreciate them in others. Likely from no fault of their own – maybe not being shown enough love growing up or going through a traumatic experience. As sad as this is, we cannot forget that you deserve a happy relationship, and should be with someone who makes you as happy as you make them.
It is easy to get caught up in a situation where perhaps there is little reciprocation. We often find ourselves trying a little harder, thinking we are not doing enough and if we just do or say the right thing, then he or she will finally start giving us what we need. In reality, we are fighting an uphill battle against the nature of a person who has developed into who they are over far more years than we have known them.
After enough situations like this, we have to be honest with ourselves about what we really want out of a relationship, and what we are (or aren’t) willing to accept. If someone isn’t giving you what you need, but you keep giving them what they need, you will find yourself in a situation similar to giving a dog a treat when they misbehave. They will just keep on doing it, because they are still getting what they want, and you haven’t put your foot down.
If you really do have all of the great qualities you know in your heart that you do, then it is time to stop accepting those into your life who don’t properly recognize or appreciate them. We all know first hand how many people out there do not put forth the effort to really earn and deserve our time, so why do we continue giving it to them? Draw the line, and walk away. Being in the wrong relationship will make you feel more alone than being single will.
You are a diamond in the rough, so stop spending your time around so many rocks. If you want more, stop accepting less.
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I think this is a concept we should all wake up every morning and begin as our personal mantra! Until we believe it whole heartedly and then far surpassing. If you haven’t already check out the book series by McCloud/Townsend “Boundaries”. Pretty Awesome!
I have a term for this: “Emotional Negative-Equity”….. the more you invest in a relationship, the less you are getting out of it. And when you get to that point, before you drain yourself dry, you just have to draw a line under things and move on, however much it may hurt.
Thanks for kind words in article, you have positive attitude towards people so they feel positive and uplifting.
Really true even for things like friendships.
Yes, yes, and yes!! Probably my favorite article you’ve written so far!
Thanks Andrew! Much appreciated sir.
Reblogged this on THE OFFICIAL NIKKI BABIE BLOG.
Hey! I know this is kinda off topic but I was
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Thanks a lot!
Before i just know that i should not give up on someone i love and it ends up being more miserable, feeling more sad and alone.. you are perfectly right when you said that being in a wrong relationship will make you feel more alone than being single.. now i know that i have to give up on someone who never appreciated me instead just making me feel so useless.. you are an inspiration..