I have been fortunate enough to be invited to some spectacular events around the city of Boston over the past couple of weeks. The best part about this is the conversations I get to have with people far more intelligent than myself from all walks of life.
Last night, I had a great discussion with two very successful men about relationships, and we covered a concept that I found interesting and would like to convey to you all to get your thoughts on it as well.
Please, I don’t want anyone to think I am categorizing or generalizing women, just hear me out.
This type of teammate in a relationship is just that – a teammate, a peer, an equal to you in terms of ambition, life goals, viewpoints, et cetera. She will challenge you and push you to become better, while she herself is doing the same.
This is a great type of relationship to have because it naturally builds mutual respect – which, let’s be honest – a relationship would collapse without. If there is no respect, there can be no love. It will also help us develop further both personally and as a couple, because each member of the team is helping and supporting the other along their own journeys.
This type of woman will stand behind the man in her life and be his support system for all of his ventures, but may not be as enthusiastically pursuing the same type of lifestyle that he is.
Generally speaking, she probably prefers more old-fashioned gender roles in a relationship, and she will understand that doesn’t make her any less of a woman. She will be confident in herself and her relationship while supporting her teammate, as he will do in return for her.
If a woman takes too much of a backseat without contributing or having her own opinions or ideas, she will be further challenged to keep an ambitious man’s interest for an extended period of time.
The ideal mix.
While neither “type” above is inherently bad or negative, myself and my conversation partners agreed that the best case scenario would be to find a woman who fits into both of these categories.
As men, we enjoy a woman who is going to challenge us intellectually (not “challenge” in the sense of being overly sarcastic or cynical, but rather to keep us on our toes). One who is going to motivate us and who we will be able to cheer on while she does great things, also.
On the flip side, we are still, naturally, emotional beings and require support and encouragement sometimes as well. A woman (or any person) who is too focused on themselves or their endeavors, may have a limited ability to stand behind their partner when it is required.
This is a much more simplistic version of the qualities men really want in a woman, but I feel that it puts things into perspective and helps us more easily determine the type of person we want to have in our lives.
The “ideal mix” is the type of woman that a man knows will stand beside him. A man needs someone he can rely on for support but also see as an equal. Someone he can lean on if he needs to, and someone who will lean on him as well. There cannot be too much push or pull in a relationship, or it will fall apart.
I think we can use these concepts to help improve our relationships and keep ourselves in check if we feel ourselves falling too far onto either side of the spectrum. A good balance is always needed. What are your thoughts? Leave your opinions in the comments below!
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