7 Things That Make A Woman Sexy


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The word “sexy” in modern day society has often become synonymous with the matched drum-beats and stiletto steps we’re used to seeing in Victoria’s Secret advertisements. Don’t get me wrong…that is sexy, but it is only one piece of the puzzle.


So, be honest…how many of you clicked on this article expecting to see a list consisting of amazing legs, abs, fake boobs, and a tan?

What society tells you is sexy on the surface, is often a small piece of the whole puzzle, if it’s a piece of it at all. But the first thing we need to do, is get rid of this damaging perception.

So, for those of us who live in the real world, what makes a woman sexy?


This is key. Being perfect, is not. A strong, purposeful walk, head held high, eye contact, and a smile – go a long way.

Confidence breeds more than just a strong presence, it’s the foundation for a strong life. Confidence also breeds:


Ambition gives a woman a purpose, a drive, a direction in life. Ambition is sexy because a man who has his own goals can see you as a partner, a teammate, someone he can take on the world with – and that’s how a relationship should be.



Passion for life. Passion for another person. Passion for an interest, a hobby, art, music, anything that drives you. To see a woman in her element and truly loving what she is doing, is sexy.


To treat others with kindness is an unacceptably rare quality in modern society. Taking a few moments to go out of your way to talk to someone, showing compassion to another member of the human race, regardless of age/gender/race/etc., all get major bonus points.


When a woman is genuinely herself and doesn’t change for anyone, it displays many of the above qualities all together. It also shows that she has enough respect for you to be straight up with you and not hide anything.



Class, as I’ve mentioned in previous articles, is about how you carry yourself, how you interact with others, and how you treat those around you. When you carry yourself with dignity it shows that you have respect for you, and those around you.


There is a serious disconnect between how much time is spent improving the body, and how much time is spent improving the mind. This goes for both genders. While your health is paramount, it’s also important to be well-rounded. I find that intelligence often comes as a package with wit and humor which are both also sexy in their own right.

While physical attraction is incredibly important in a relationship, two people won’t last if they can’t have meaningful conversations, laugh, and cry together. If they don’t respect and trust each other. If they can’t display kindness and compassion towards one another. And most importantly, if they can’t be themselves around each other.


You could both be perfect on the outside, which will carry you physically for awhile, but without these other qualities, the flame may burn strongly – but briefly.

You don’t have to win the lottery in the gene pool to be sexy. We are all dealt a hand of cards that we can’t control, but we can decide how we play our hand.

Choose wisely.


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  1. Graciela SouthernBelle on July 25, 2014 at 12:09 pm

    Nailed it once again! I’m amazed at how well you know women and men! You are very perceptive and thank goodness, you share your thoughts!

  2. Kara on July 25, 2014 at 12:25 pm

    Your blog posts never cease to inspire and impress me. This one continues that trend. Thank you for covering the key areas that make a woman sexy, not just why society likes to project. My boyfriend tells me all the time that my kindness & my smile/laugh are what attracted him to me. Our ability to be honest with each other has built a strong foundation for a long-lasting relationship.

  3. Nathalie on July 25, 2014 at 1:07 pm

    Great article as always. My husband and I have been together for 21 years. We are in our late 40s, we have gotten greyer and heavier in that time. We have 3 kids and have built a life.
    Over the years, the meaning of sexy has changed for us. I still find him attractive and he definitely curls my toes. But now it’s more about knowing each other. Watching him with our kids and still seeing desire in his eyes when he looks at me. Those things are sexier than a 6 pack. And I know, from our conversations that he feels the same way. I guess sexy, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder.
    Keep up the work James!

  4. Danz Social Blog on July 25, 2014 at 2:29 pm

    Reblogged this on Danz Social Blog and commented:
    Definitely something to think about. Really profound

  5. jblondie09 on July 25, 2014 at 7:01 pm

    I loved this! I’m glad Ambition was on here 🙂

  6. ComeLookListen on July 26, 2014 at 4:57 pm

    On point James!

  7. Katie on July 31, 2014 at 2:56 am

    I was impressed how occurred these definitions came out. You magically touched a theme that was bothering me for a long time.
    These is a story of my past. I struggled to loose weight making HIS dream come true. I was young-tall-blond-skinny (all at once, no doubt about it). But I was left as soon as I reached it.
    So there is an advice: never go for it. HE LOVES REAL YOU WHEN HE TRULY LOVES. DON’T make the same mistake and see your imperfection as a reason for discourage. Leave him/dog/apartment/comfort zonw and move on. You will be happier then.

  8. jagueygrande on August 4, 2014 at 8:50 am

    Reblogged this on jagueygrande and commented:
    Por cierto.

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