It doesn’t take much perusing around Facebook to see people breaking up, getting back together, breaking up again, swearing the other person off for life, then somehow getting back together again, and…expecting it to be different this time?
I fear for the future if that is what a ‘healthy relationship’ looks like to Generation Y.
We have already discussed 8 signs of a toxic relationship, but what does a solid, healthy relationship look like?
- You support each other.
Whether or not you share each others’ passions or life ambitions, when you truly care about someone you want to see them succeed and be happy in whatever they love. This means standing beside them, not in their way, when they dedicate effort towards pursuing a goal.
- You trust each other.
I’m not sure why this one is so difficult to grasp, but if your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to go out with their friends who they haven’t seen in awhile, what’s the harm? A solid relationship won’t be shaken by this simple act and you’ll know they’ll be back in your arms at the end of the night or the next day. Nothing to see here, kids – move along.
- Your ex’s aren’t the devil.
We all have a past. Often times, our pasts include other significant others. When learning about someone or getting to know them, there will probably be important points in their life that include someone besides yourself. If you demonize their exes or refuse to hear about them, you’re cutting out much of their life. The present is all that matters.
A healthy relationship will be open to all topics of discussion and realize that the past is in the past – now is what matters.
- The lines of communication are always open.
Communication is the key to a solid relationship. You should be able to bring anything up to your boyfriend or girlfriend. This includes things going on in your own life, or things you need to talk to them about directly. Healthy relationships don’t cause you to harbor or hold back feelings for fear of their reactions – you should be in a judgment free zone.
- You are “physically active” together.
Let’s face it, this is a big part of a relationship – and it’ll be easy to tell if you’re in a good place together or not.
- You are good enough.
When you’re with the right person, they won’t try to change you. Why would you want to change something you love? That being said, you’ll be motivated to improve yourself and your life (as everyone should be), but without changing who you are as a person.
This one needs no explanation – mutual respect between partners in a relationship is paramount to its success. Honesty, trust, friendship, and intimacy all grow from this foundation. Without respect, there is nothing else.
- You have discussions, not fights.
I’ve been with my girlfriend for over a year and a half, and we have had a grand total of … *drumroll* … zero arguments. This isn’t to say that everything is always sunshine and rainbows and bunnies running through fields of flowers, but I see no reason to fight with my girlfriend.
It’s natural to face conflicts when you spend a lot of time with any person, but a healthy relationship will resolve any issues by discussing their opinions and stances in order to understand each other better and reach a solution they both agree on. Frequent nasty, vindictive fights are a sign to re-evaluate your ‘relationship.’
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