Why We Need To Talk About Christy Mack And Victim Blaming
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For those of you who are unaware, Christy Mack is an “adult entertainment” star who is the former girlfriend of MMA fighter Jon Koppenhaver, otherwise known as “War Machine.”
This past Friday morning around 2:00am, Jon showed up at Christy’s Las Vegas home, after having left her and moved back to San Diego in May. The following is an account of the experience from Christy’s perspective (Source – also contains photos of Christy), and may be disturbing for some to read.
‘About 2 a.m. Friday morning, Jon Koppenhaver arrived unannounced to my home in Las Vegas, NV, after he broke up with me in May he moved out of my house and back to San Diego,’ Mack wrote on Twitter. ‘When he arrived, he found myself and one other fully clothed and unarmed in the house. Without a single word spoken, he began beating my friend; once he was finished, he sent my friend away and turned his attention to me.
‘He made me undress and shower in front of him, then dragged me out and beat my face. I have no recollection of how many times I was hit, I just know my injuries that resulted from my beating. My injuries include 18 broken bones around my eyes, my nose is broken in 2 places, I am missing teeth and several more are broken.’
The abuse present in this relationship is no secret, as Koppenhaver has spent time in jail before for assault, as well as multiple other incidents, including being publicly accused of being physically violent towards Christy before from her Twitter account (Tweets which she deleted shortly after, and Koppenhaver said she was “just kidding.”)
Needless to say, Koppenhaver has been released from promotional contracts because of his behavior. He also claims he was “fighting for his life” against the man he found in her apartment. While anything is possible, I think we can all agree this seems highly unlikely, especially given his history and profession. Furthermore, even if the other man was violent towards him, there is no possible excuse for what he did to Christy.
Even if she was cheating – she is a small woman and he is an MMA fighter with a history of violence. There is no excuse.
Now, to the point.
One of the major reasons I bring this up is because of a comment I saw on Facebook earlier. The comment read:
Those type of guy’s are not mentally fine and they need to see a therapist. But certain women do know how to pick them and love to be mistreated.
Hold on, what? Can you name one single woman who has ever actually enjoyed being mistreated, abused, or hospitalized with injuries sustained at the hands of her own boyfriend? What kind of nonsense is this?
It’s called victim-blaming. To say “Oh, she should’ve known better.” Or that she should have left him before things escalated to this point, is entirely missing the reality of domestic violence. Not to mention from what we understand in this case, the two weren’t even a couple anymore anyway.
The fact of the matter is that there are many signs of abuse that some people may miss until it’s too late, and there are also mental and emotional attachments that keep someone with an abuser that most of us will never understand.
But one thing we can understand is – nobody actually wants to be abused. To make comments like this is more than just a harmless statement on Facebook, it is perpetuating the idea that some people enjoy the situation they are in and are choosing it for themselves. In case you’re wondering, yes, I did say something to him.
Say what you want about Christy’s career choice or the character of Koppenhaver, but one fact remains: She didn’t want this, and she certainly didn’t deserve it. Nobody does.
If you, or someone you know, has been or is an ongoing victim of any kind of abuse, but especially physical please immediately take action to get help. We need to all stand together against these cowardly acts – especially us as men.
Men are the ones perpetuating the problem, and men will play a vital role in stopping it. Do not feel nervous about standing up and speaking out. Feel nervous about what will happen if you don’t.
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