Why You Need To Stop Blaming Yourself


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With the distractions of Facebook, Twitter, and other social media sites – it seems as though healthy, monogamous relationships are becoming harder to find.

Cheating has been around since the beginning of time. Social media certainly doesn’t cause it, but it can enable it. It’s easier to connect with men and women across the world than ever before, and temptation literally stares you in the face every day as you’re scrolling through your newsfeed.


In my opinion, there is never an excuse for cheating, no matter how much you’re tempted. A further problem though, is when the person who is cheated on begins to blame themselves.

Women in particular – may take a blow to their self-esteem, feel that they’re not attractive enough, or in some major cases even be made to feel that they did something (or didn’t do something) that pushed their significant other away and caused them to cheat.


Stop that.

If someone is dissatisfied in a relationship, and isn’t mature enough to approach you directly to speak about their feelings, that has nothing to do with you.

It doesn’t mean you’re not pretty enough.

It doesn’t mean you’re not sexy enough.

It doesn’t mean you did something wrong.

It just means that they are unable to control themselves or their emotions, and maturely handle situations.


Whether the man or the woman is at fault – I would rather have a relationship end, than to cheat or be cheated on.

It’s not something you ‘slip up’ and do, and it’s not a ‘mistake’ – it’s a choice, and the only one at fault is the one who does the cheating.

Remember, communication is the key to a solid relationship.

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1 Comment

  1. Jennifer W on October 2, 2013 at 12:44 pm

    It’s very true. A person doesn’t just fall into sex with someone. They first decide they’re open to the experience. They allow themselves to be in a position where it is an option. There are so many moments in the lead-up to even a brief, fiery encounter where a person makes simple yes/no decisions that all pile up to decide the final will I/won’t I decision. It’s not ever just that one last decision. It is the multiple smaller ones that accumulate. They decide to be devious by default when they decide to not intentionally do the right thing. So yes, it is fully the fault of the cheater. They do have a choice. They have so many choices, even if they’re unaware of these choices.

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